From the outside looking in, if you were to take a peek into my life to see all crappy things I've been dealing with lately, you might wonder how I'm managing to look like i'm keep it all together. As such, I present to you the next installment of my public service series:
How To Stay Sane When Surrounded By Insanity 101
1) I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends: A friend in need is a friend indeed. Even when you barely have time to yourself, let alone time to see your friends, those phone calls, texts, emails, and messenger chats sending words of love, support, wisdom and encouragement always remind me that I am indeed, not alone in this world. In tough times, its quite easy to let yourself sink into the quicksand of despair and self-pity, where no one can hear or see you. That's why you need your friends to pick you up by the shoulders, dust you off and push you forwards into the world. When times are good, invest in your friends; in an emotional downturn, the returns are immeasurable.
2) Natural Disasters / Poverty / Famine / War / General Shittiness Happening In The World At Any Given Time: Just watching the news these days makes me feel grateful and forces me to focus on the good things that I have going for me (if you must, count them out on your fingers), remember that my troubles pale in comparison to the horrors happening in the world at large and reminds me that things could be far far worse. If victims of war, earthquakes and tsunamis can find it in themselves to pick up the pieces and re-build their lives, so can we.
3) Inertia: As per the laws of the physical world, when you're out running and come to an abrupt stop, breaking back into a run becomes a gargantuan task. Similarly, when you stop moving and take the time to dwell on your troubles, making yourself move onwards and upwards becomes equally as difficult. When times are hard, sometimes the unexamined life is the only way to survive; you just have to suck it up, and keep moving. If you must, allow yourself to wallow for a bit. But once you're done, come up with a plan, keep yourself active and busy and focus on the moving parts. It may be very non-Westernised approach to life (and alternatively, a very Asian way of dealing with problems), but when you look back and remember how you weathered the storm, you may be quite surprised at how much stronger you are today for it.
4) Retail Therapy: As a friend once said, as long as you can afford it, there is absolutely nothing wrong with treating yourself to something pretty. Ok, so I may end up bankrupting myself into a glorious haze of materialistic happiness, but gosh darnit, that new watermelon red Alexa, those new nude Tory Burch flats, and that new silk Hansel dress sure as heck made me feel better. So whatever floats your boat, be it fashion, gadgets, books, comic book figurines, lotions or potions, go ahead and indulge yourself a bit, and tell yourself, you deserve it.
5) Burying Yourself Under A Mountain Work: This helps a lot with achieving (3) above. When you're insanely busy, running around like a headless chicken and struggling to stay on top of your ever growing to-do-list at work, you don't have the luxury of dwelling, and have no choice but to keep moving. I just do not have any space in my Outlook calendar to schedule an emotional breakdown -I mean, who has that kind of time? It helps if you have an interesting job, even better if it requires frequent travel to far flung exotic locations where you can meet sexy men with foreign accents that can provide additional distraction. Ok, so my job entails neither of the above, but it serves its purpose in allowing me to achieve both (3) and (4) above. And if you're lucky enough to have such stellar and supportive colleagues like mine, (1) as well.
6) The Bigger Picture: I wanted to write something about God and faith, but I think it would be misleading of me to extensively comment on the subject. In a way, i've lost my faith, because to believe that everything happens for a reason and that all of this crappiness is all part of someone's greater plan doesn't give me much comfort. But everyone has a different relationship with faith and the metaphysical, and if its something that provides you comfort, by all means, stick with it. As they say, time heals all, and perhaps one day ill find my way back to it again.
In conclusion, when life hands you lemons, stick to guidelines (1) to (6) above, and you'll be sipping some lemonade in no time. What that means is : you will be okay.
How To Stay Sane When Surrounded By Insanity 101
1) I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends: A friend in need is a friend indeed. Even when you barely have time to yourself, let alone time to see your friends, those phone calls, texts, emails, and messenger chats sending words of love, support, wisdom and encouragement always remind me that I am indeed, not alone in this world. In tough times, its quite easy to let yourself sink into the quicksand of despair and self-pity, where no one can hear or see you. That's why you need your friends to pick you up by the shoulders, dust you off and push you forwards into the world. When times are good, invest in your friends; in an emotional downturn, the returns are immeasurable.
2) Natural Disasters / Poverty / Famine / War / General Shittiness Happening In The World At Any Given Time: Just watching the news these days makes me feel grateful and forces me to focus on the good things that I have going for me (if you must, count them out on your fingers), remember that my troubles pale in comparison to the horrors happening in the world at large and reminds me that things could be far far worse. If victims of war, earthquakes and tsunamis can find it in themselves to pick up the pieces and re-build their lives, so can we.
3) Inertia: As per the laws of the physical world, when you're out running and come to an abrupt stop, breaking back into a run becomes a gargantuan task. Similarly, when you stop moving and take the time to dwell on your troubles, making yourself move onwards and upwards becomes equally as difficult. When times are hard, sometimes the unexamined life is the only way to survive; you just have to suck it up, and keep moving. If you must, allow yourself to wallow for a bit. But once you're done, come up with a plan, keep yourself active and busy and focus on the moving parts. It may be very non-Westernised approach to life (and alternatively, a very Asian way of dealing with problems), but when you look back and remember how you weathered the storm, you may be quite surprised at how much stronger you are today for it.
4) Retail Therapy: As a friend once said, as long as you can afford it, there is absolutely nothing wrong with treating yourself to something pretty. Ok, so I may end up bankrupting myself into a glorious haze of materialistic happiness, but gosh darnit, that new watermelon red Alexa, those new nude Tory Burch flats, and that new silk Hansel dress sure as heck made me feel better. So whatever floats your boat, be it fashion, gadgets, books, comic book figurines, lotions or potions, go ahead and indulge yourself a bit, and tell yourself, you deserve it.
5) Burying Yourself Under A Mountain Work: This helps a lot with achieving (3) above. When you're insanely busy, running around like a headless chicken and struggling to stay on top of your ever growing to-do-list at work, you don't have the luxury of dwelling, and have no choice but to keep moving. I just do not have any space in my Outlook calendar to schedule an emotional breakdown -I mean, who has that kind of time? It helps if you have an interesting job, even better if it requires frequent travel to far flung exotic locations where you can meet sexy men with foreign accents that can provide additional distraction. Ok, so my job entails neither of the above, but it serves its purpose in allowing me to achieve both (3) and (4) above. And if you're lucky enough to have such stellar and supportive colleagues like mine, (1) as well.
6) The Bigger Picture: I wanted to write something about God and faith, but I think it would be misleading of me to extensively comment on the subject. In a way, i've lost my faith, because to believe that everything happens for a reason and that all of this crappiness is all part of someone's greater plan doesn't give me much comfort. But everyone has a different relationship with faith and the metaphysical, and if its something that provides you comfort, by all means, stick with it. As they say, time heals all, and perhaps one day ill find my way back to it again.
In conclusion, when life hands you lemons, stick to guidelines (1) to (6) above, and you'll be sipping some lemonade in no time. What that means is : you will be okay.
2 comments:
Dont be sad. Pls get the book of said title. Hugs.
Mooke
hi Yan,
since this is the only place to reach you, i heard about auntie Sharifah already from dad in Jordan a few days ago. Heartfelt condolences to you and your family Yan. Just stay strong alright..take care
Muaz
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